


Repetition

by LegoHurtsLikeSatan



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov Friendship, F/M, Hurt Tony Stark, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Post-Captain America: Civil War (Movie), Protect my precious children, Protective Clint Barton, Protective Steve Rogers, Psychological Torture, Steve Rogers Feels, Stucky - Freeform, Tony Stark Has Issues, Torture, more tags to be added as more chapters are published, split personality
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-02
Updated: 2016-11-23
Packaged: 2018-08-28 16:40:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 3,658
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8453890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LegoHurtsLikeSatan/pseuds/LegoHurtsLikeSatan
Summary: This is the sequel to 'Redemption' that is accessible on my account.PLEASE READ REDEMPTION BEFORE REPETITION!...This story follows our three protagonists, Boudicca, Loki and Bucky on their way to being free from their captors.Sometimes, to be free, you have to go through some things a second time......This story will be just as emotional as the first instalment, more tags will be added with chapters in order to keep spoilers secret.Feel free to comment, like either here or on my tumblr LegoHurtsLikeSatan.





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> Please bare in mind that this is a sequel to Redemption, so please read it first by following this link: http://archiveofourown.org/works/7906174/chapters18061384

Boudicca woke up slowly, facing the glaring white light again. She was happy to see a tray of food on the little table beside her white sofa. She was so hungry but they refused to feed her unless she was completely asleep.

 

 

Once she tried to fake sleep to see how her captors were getting in and out of the cell. She laid in bed for two days straight, staying awake for as long as possible until she noticed something strange when showering.

She was washing her hair and rubbing the conditioner from her neck when her fingers drifted over the top of her spine. It felt like a pound coin under her skin. She tried to pull it and felt pain shooting all over her body, crippling her.

 

 **“That was a warning. Do not try that again.”** A voice over the intercom boomed.

 

That was the first and only time she had heard a voice.

 

That is when she completely lost her cool. She was hungry, tired and angry. She screeched for the voice to answer her questions, where was she? Why had she not seen anyone? When would they kill her? Why had they tagged her like a dog? Hadn’t they enough by surveying her constantly, leaving the lights at a constant brightness at all time, taken away her means of measuring time pass?

 

She punched the walls, bruising and making her knuckles bleed. She upturned the sofa, ripped the various books to shreds. Anything she could throw, she threw.

As her final act of her tantrum, she used her powers to shake the entire ship, making everything move and smash. She didn’t stop using her powers, despite the sirens, until the glass walls of her cell started to crack under the pressure of the ocean. She then collapsed into what was left of her quilt, letting sleep take her.

…

 

She awoke hours (days?) later. All furniture had been replaced.

“Wouldn’t want me to hurt herself, hm?” _or kill yourself_ her head continued her sentence.

 

She sat down on the nearly identical sofa to what she had had previously and looked to her right where on the white plastic table a tray of food was waiting.

 

“About time.” She grumbled, digging into the cold soup, dipping her hard roll in an attempt to soften it.

 

She looked across the room. There were deep cracks in the glass that where now opaque. Boudicca smiled at the thought of workers coming in and having to clean everything that she had destroyed, but being unable to repair the glass completely to its former state of bright whiteness.

 

She swallowed down the last of the soup and went and washed her face in the sink. She wandered back to sofa, where three books lay stacked on each other in in different coloured sleeves.

She picked up the first, a blue covered book and wandered back to her bed, curling up in make shift fort, opening the book.

 

“’The Picture of Doran Grey’? Cool! I haven’t read this in a long time!” and she settled down, the drones of Elvis’ ‘Heartbreak Hotel’ still reaching her ears, no matter how many pillows she put over her ears.

 

At first it was nice to hear the song, she loved music so much and it filled the empty room like a mother’s hug. When it played a second time around, she thought it must have been a glitch in the speakers, they would sort it.

By the sixth time, she knew that they were not going to change the song at all. She began to hate the beat, it was too fast, it was too slow, it was too deep, it was too soft, it was everything and nothing at once and it annoyed her.

 

She had stopped counting how many times it had played that first day. She slept in hopes of blocking it out. Despite her sleeping, the music was just as loud and the lights just as bright. When she woke up the next morning, she began to cry in despair.

 

“CHANGE THE DAMN SONG!” She had screamed. Nothing had happened.

 

By the time she had woken from her tenth sleep, she fell in love with the music. It was the only thing constant. It was her only voice that spoke to her. It comforted her in her sterile white hell.

…

 

One day, the music stopped. The lights dimmed. Boudicca had panicked and broke down. Her music had stopped playing, her only friend that understood her pain completely, who sang morosely _‘You feel so lonely you could die'_ had gone and left her.

She laid chest down into the bed and sobbed.

She was so stress and tired and lonely. She needed a break from this torture, but not like this.

 

 

She eventually steadied her breath, wiping her eyes, when she felt a presence in the room. She looked around and found no one.

 

 _There is someone here!_ Her brain screamed.

 

She felt the air shift around her, slightly cooler than the rest of room.

 

_“I’m coming Boudicca, I love you.”_

 

She felt his word fill her heart, her mind, her soul. She smiled in relief.

 

Loki was coming back for her.

…


	2. Chapter Two

To say that Bucky was stressed, would be a MAJOR understatement! Ever since he and the team had got to Wakanda, he wasn’t able to sleep, eat or focus.

 

They had agreed to look into finding people with super human powers and give them the option of being freelancers without Ross and the UN noticing. Natasha had tracked them down and was staying with them, helping them find people. Bucky was glad to have Natasha there, she was one of the few friends that he had remembered meeting beforehand.

 

With help and Barton confirming his story, Bucky had retold Boudicca’s story to the team and with their support and expertise they were searching for Boo too. It helped shoulder some of his worries.

But unfortunately (and rather guiltily), Boudicca was not his main concern at this point.

 

Someone had managed to control the Solider. They weren’t even Hydra. It was just an ordinary man with an agenda. They used him as a pawn in their intricate game.

 

What would stop anyone else from doing that? What if they used him for much worse things? He thought he had finally controlled the Solider by himself, but with that damn red book around and its whereabouts unknown, no one was safe from him.

Even Boudicca.

 

 

It was another sleepless night. Bucky had long given up trying to sleep. When he couldn’t drop straight away, he would go into the teams’ kitchen and continue his search for Boudicca on his laptop, a camomile tea on one side of the breakfast bar, a notepad on the other.

 

The team knew about it and hoped that this would just be a phase, help him get back into everyday life, give him a focus.

 

Bucky knew better. He knew that even if he wasn’t too stressed to sleep, he wouldn’t sleep comfortably anyway, what with the flashes of terrible memories and nightmares. For the time being, he would sleep when he could- there was no point forcing himself.

 

 

Bucky’s thoughts were interrupted by a yawning Clint stumbling into the kitchen, evident that he had just woke up in the last few minutes.

 

“Hey, do you mind company? Had a bit of a night fright and don’t fancy going back to sleep not quite yet.”

 

Bucky shrugged his shoulder, writing down his last note before closing the laptop. As much as Bucky had to say, he didn’t talk much, but didn’t want to look like he was ignoring Clint.

 

Bucky liked Clint a lot. He was a spy as well but he always saw the best in people and fought to get that side shown to everyone. He’d done it with Natasha, Bucky had not seen Natasha as happy and laugh as much around the team than ever before. When they were in Russia together, it was quieter and more serious but they still tried to laugh occasionally. Clint always knew where his priority was and never missed his mark- that didn’t mean that he could enjoy himself at the same time!

 

“Anything in particular?”

 

Clint sighed and grabbed a mug of tea. Usually he would have had coffee but it was 4am and he needed to get back to sleep at some point.

 

“The same thing as usual. Seeing my family ask where I am on TV. If Stark dares tell Ross where they are, I will turn him into a kebab.”

 

“I don’t think he will,” Bucky said softly, “He’s had plenty of opportunity to and hasn’t yet.”

 

“All the more reason to look after my family right here,” Clint faced Bucky with a warm smile, “What’s been happening man? You haven’t had a decent night’s sleep since we got here two months ago.”

 

“Stressed I suppose,” Bucky went to run his hand through his hair but abruptly remembered that his only arm was holding his tea. Bucky began to shake, _Oh god, not again!_ He said to himself.

 

“Hey, dude, breathe with me, in and out” Clint said reassuringly, putting his tea down on the breakfast bar and holding Bucky hand in his, breathing deeply.

 

After a few minutes, Bucky looked up at Clint, his eyes tired and worn.

 

“I need a reset.”

 

…

 

It had been planned between them all, T’Challa had got his best scientists in to create the chamber for Bucky. They’d run through what would happen in what emergencies, what the risks were, if Bucky really wanted this.

 

Bucky had confirmed every time they’d asked him; he wasn’t safe to be around until they’d figured how to destroy the Winter Solider.

 

 _He wasn’t giving up, he was recuperating,_ he told himself.

 

Bucky begged them to keep looking for Boudicca, to wake him up when they found her so he could go with them. He owed her for saving him the first time.

Of course the team agreed, they were his family after all and if she was his friend, then she was their friend.

 

The only thing that he hadn’t sorted was his feelings for Steve.

 

He knew he had deep feelings for him, far more than just friends. He knew that.

He was friends with Natasha, Clint, Wanda, Sam, Scott and T’Challa.

He was more than just friends with Steve.

He knew long before he had even laid eyes on him, even the Winter Solider knew.

 

He just didn’t know what that feeling was called.

 

 

The rest of the team respectfully agreed with his decision, only Steve disagreed, loudly.

 

“C’mon Steve, what’s your issue? Everyone else agrees it’s for the best.” Bucky called through his bedroom door after the meeting.

 

The door opened abruptly, “I am not everyone else Bucky, I am your best friend. I don’t want you to go again.”

 

Bucky felt guilty, whilst he had been trying to find out who Steve was, Steve was looking for his best friend. Now he was here, Bucky would go away again without consulting with Steve privately beforehand.

 

“I’m sorry, I didn’t think it would be this much of an issue. I didn’t think you’d care this much.”

 

Steve put his hands either side of Bucky’s face, gently guiding his gaze to Steve’s.

 

“Of course I lov- care about you Bucky.” Steve dropped his hands and blushed deeply.

 

Bucky pulled Steve in to hug him, trying to show how much that meant to him with his one hand.

 

…

 

Now that they had shut the glass door, Bucky realised what Steve meant to him.

 

He looked into Steve’s eyes, engraining the image into his head.

 

He loved Steve and Steve loved him.


	3. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, sorry for the delay in updates, I've been writing my university work!

Boudicca sat back on her mountain of pillows and blankets, closing the blue version of “The picture of Dorian Grey”. She had spent her entire day reading the final chapter, sounding out every word, tasting the syllables on her tongue, feeling the ink under her fingers, listening to the sound of the page turning.

She had done this everyday with every chapter in all three books. They had played a cruel game and give Boo three copies of “The picture of Dorian Grey”. At first Boudicca was annoyed, but then she learned to appreciate it- the different page layouts, the textures of the pages, the different introductions that reflected the lives of those who had edited the version.

 

They were playing cruel games with her but she refused to give them the satisfaction of her breaking down.

 

She would be patient.

 

She placed the blue book carefully on to the pile.

 

She would wait.

…

 

 

“You know,” Amora said with a smile, “You could just make me your Queen and then we wouldn’t have to do this ceremony every time you need to leave Asgard.”

 

Loki lowered the staff into Amora’s hands, the temporary transference of power complete. He met Amora’s eyes with a smile.

 

“Ah but that means you’d have to be around me forever! And I think we are both mature enough to admit that you use me as much as I use you!”

 

Loki walked down the steps from the throne, his coat fluttering in the breeze of the open hall.

 

“Besides Amora, how could you stand to be the second most beautiful when stood forever next to me?” Loki laughed.

…

 

 

**“Boss? General Ross is calling. He says it’s an emergency.”** FRIDAY's voice rang throughout the room.

 

Tony groaned, he had tried to take a nap. Ever since he had gotten back to America, it was _Ross wants you to do this, Ross needs this now, Ross has requested a meeting._ Couldn’t anyone give him a break, just to recover and try and process what has happened? He was just so tired.

 

Tony shifted the paperwork that Ross had needed last week around his desk, trying to find the phone.

 

“Tony, we- “shouted Ross.

“Just a minute please.” Interrupted Stark smugly.

“What? No! Tony! - “pled Ross as Tony put him on hold. As much as he probably shouldn’t have done that, Tony felt slightly better being able to control this aspect of his life.

 

He stood up and stretched. There was no way Tony was going to face Ross without a coffee as he wandered down to the kitchen.

…

 

 

The second time the music stopped and the lights turned off, Boudicca didn’t panic. Instead she stood up, put the green version of Dorian Grey on top of the other two.

The emergency red lights came on as Boo made her bed, wiped the bathroom area down quickly and sat in the sofa, awaiting her rescue.

…

 

 

Tony sat back down at the cluttered desk, putting his cup of coffee wherever he found space, sighed deeply and put Ross on the phone.

“Okay,” Stark said bored, “which file is late today?”

“… Tony? Help…” replied Ross faintly.

…

 

 

Screams echoed into Boudicca’s cell. It had made her jump at first. She remembered that there were other people out there after all this time. Boudicca was indifferent to the screams, instead, she found them fascinating. She began to hypothesis what was happening up there and found she was enjoying herself. It had been weeks since she had a break from mundaneness and now she was able to think more clearly than before. She was in pure bliss of the simplicity until it hit her.

 

Why was she not concerned for the people up there?

 

She didn’t ponder this for long. As soon as she had questioned herself, the screaming had stopped.

 

Maybe she had truly gone mad and was hallucinating things now?

 

 

A clear glass cylinder descended from the hole in the ceiling slowly and quietly. It reached the floor and stopped. A door slid open and a warm light shined softly, inviting her inside. Boudicca walked carefully inside and the door shut almost immediately and began to ascend.

 

She tried to look around but it was a narrow fit. She would just have to assess the danger when she left the elevator.

 

The lift breached the ceiling and Boudicca looked around in awe of the destruction. The metal walls had been ripped open to get to the control panels, the ceiling falling in on itself, huge lights broken and its shattered glass littering the floor.

 

She looked in front of her and there he stood.

 

Hair wild, blood splattered across his armour, eyes wild and excited.

 

“Loki” Boudicca breathed.

…


	4. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for how long this update took! I've been writing my uni work that was due in. It's done now so look forward to the more predictable uploads!

“Loki?” Boudicca asked, walking tentatively towards him.

 

With an impatient growl, Loki close the gap and claimed her lips, one arm clasping around her waist, one hand in her hair pulling her head back slightly whilst he ravaged her mouth with tongues and teeth.

They pulled away for a second to catch their breath, before they claimed each other’s lips again, trying to share their pent up feelings through their tongues, teeth and hands.

 

Loki pulled back and held Boudicca’s face between his hands roughly.

“Why Boudicca? Why couldn’t you follow one order? Why didn’t you stay in that safe house?” He said softly.

 

“I waited. I didn’t know if I had hallucinated the whole the ‘nice guy’ thing you had going or if it was a reflex from the abuse. I had nothing for entire year and half, no indication of you ever coming back.” She said harshly, pulling away from his grip.

 

“I explained why I had to, I kept you safe, it’s now safe, let’s go.” Loki replied frustrated. He turned and walked down the corridor, her react was totally expected after what he had done to her, he was a fool for believing that their reunion would be like romance stories. He would have to work hard to try and get her to trust him entirely, but at this point, it seemed an impossible task.

 

He wanted to make everything better for her.

…

 

They walked into the main entrance hall, tension thick in the air. Loki had taken out a LOT of anger. Computer screens smashed, pipes and cables ripped up haphazardly, alarms silenced but the red flashing lights still strobing. The entire ship was filled with gasps, groans of pain and held breaths. Then the smell of blood filled Boudicca’s nostrils.

At that instant, her face relaxed as she sighed happily, skipping to Loki and kissing him gently.

“Thank you.” She sighed. She looked like a child at Christmas who had gotten exactly what she wanted.

And she had wanted her captors to suffer.

 

Loki watched as she skipped away, surveying the scale of his destruction.

This was new, Boudicca had changed majorly since the last time he had seen her before the Battle of New York.

And it scared him slightly.

 

 

“Ah you are the highest ranking round here, so you must be in charge of this sick torture centre! Hi! I’m Boudicca! Nice to meet you!”

Loki wheeled round to see her stood over a greying man who was laid out on the floor, a large steel beam protruding from his chest.

 

“You know what? You’ll be happy to know that you are not going to die today! This beam,” She grabbed it and twisted it, making the man scream pitifully. “This beam has only punctured one of your lungs! You get to see another day!”

 

_“Hello… Hello?! Ross talk to me!”_

 

Loki strolled over to a telephone that was hanging near ‘Ross’ and pressed the loudspeaker button, allowing the voice to echo off the walls.

 

“Come on Ross, answer the call. It is very rude to ignore them.” Loki said with an eyebrow raised.

 

“mmph, Ton- “

 

“He can’t hear you! Speak louder!” Sang Boudicca, kicking his chest roughly, making him scream.

 

Boudicca skipped over to the phone, kissing Loki’s cheek on the way, “Hey Tony! What you been up to? It’s been ages since you saw me last!”

 

“Ah, the man of Iron?”

 

“Yeah, that’s him babe!”

 

_“LOKI?!”_

…

 

Now Tony was panicking!

Last he had heard was that Loki was dead and that was from Thor…

… of whom he hadn’t heard from since the Ultron incident.

 

Oh fuck!

 

And now Boudicca seemed even more crazy than ever! What had they done to her in there? What had Loki done to her? He knew the answers to none of these questions but he knew that the entire prison was compromised and that he was flying into a trap alone.

 

Oh fuck.

…

 

“Okay Boudicca, I think it is time to go.”

 

“But I can take him, I want- “

 

“No,” Loki said harshly “This isn’t you, we are going home now.”

 

“But- “

 

“NO!” He roared, grabbing Boudicca by the throat and slamming her into the control panel, “This has gone too far, we are leaving!”

 

The madness in her eyes melted away to reveal remorse and fear. Loki released her throat and pulled her up into his chest, letting her sob into it.

 

“This isn’t me…” She repeated softly.

 

“I know,” Loki replied sadly, “I’m going to help you Boo, please let me.”

 

“… okay…”

 

…

 

Tony saw the sky split before him as a huge beam of light landed directly on the surface of the raft and suddenly stopped a moment later.

He landed on the surface, the Asgardian marks branded into the metal.

They had gone and left horrifying destruction in their wake.

 

“FRIDAY, we need help quickly, send out a message to the UN."


	5. SUGGESTIONS PLEASE!

THIS IS NOT A CHAPTER!

First of all, I am sorry about the slow update but I have hit a writers block majorly!  
I know where I want to take this story but I am not sure how to proceed with it!

If anyone out there has any ideas of what they want to add to the next chapter I would be eternally grateful!

So please comment your suggestions either on here or on my tumblr- LegoHurtsLikeSatan.  
I don't want this story to die but I do need help!

Thanks guys!


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